Stuck

sunset

I know, I know, it’s been forever since I’ve written.  I see other blogs where people write as little as one paragraph or even just a photo caption and call that an entry.  I guess I don’t have to wait for some mega-inspiration to write about what’s going on in my life, but I feel like if you’re going to take time out of your day to read my words, then I should make them worthwhile and put a lot of work into them.  The thing is:  I’ve never struggled to write before.  At the height of my heyday, when I published a book of poetry when I was 18, I wouldn’t even need to have a particular goal or topic in mind.  Poems came through my pen organically, with almost no conscious effort, and as they came is how they were meant to be.  I never went back and edited for subject, only occasionally for punctuation.  I never worked at my craft, it just was.  I just crafted.

Several personal struggles lead to the burnout of my writing “career.”  I won’t get in to too much detail, but there were deaths, drugs, and depression involved, and for the better part of seven years I’ve been almost physically incapable of creative writing.  I lost a very important outlet, something that during previous difficulties had helped me cope.  I had a poetry mentor once, who told me the key is to write every single day, no matter what.  Force yourself, even if it’s just for five minutes or just a few sentences, to put your pen to paper.  I understood her advice, but it went against my process.  I didn’t have to try; when the words wanted to come, they came.  But then they stopped.

In a way this ties back to one of my original posts about figuring out the direction of this blog.  I don’t know how often or for how long you may want to hear about my life’s ups and downs.  For you, should I just focus on happy times and lighthearted life happenings? Or are you interested in what it’s like in my head?  Are you sure?

thinker

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One response to “Stuck

  1. Just what is in your head is great. Sometimes it reminds us of our own similar moments in time its these moments that connect us all. Just writing about the happy times only makes us wonder why all our times are not happy……….i’m just saying :]

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